Tuesday, July 26, 2011


Well today is Tuesday and I lost weight, thank God for that. I want to share with you a bible verse. Galatians 5:22-23. The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Well, I’m having problems with self-control with my diet. And of course, its not the first time I haven’t had self control, I have been up and down the weight scale for so many years, its hard to believe. If I had stayed down all the times I had lost weight I would probably weigh about 120 lbs, wouldn’t that be nice. Just dreaming here. But let’s talk about self-control. Most people learn self control by there parents, don’t do this; do this its better this way. You know those words but it does teach us that we need to do certain things and not. How we do later on in life determine some times how we respond to these things we have been taught as a child. When we have a dysfunctional family, we have to do things we don’t want to do and our minds and bodies get messed up with this type of thing, because deep down inside we know it’s not right but we still have to perform and do things that is against our being.

Well as we get older and get out of this environment, we have a tendency to rebel against things we have to do or should do, even when it’s best for our bodies and our beings. But because of this rebellion attitude that was developed as we were being abused, it seems like it never leaves. I have asked God to give me self-control and will keep asking and He has in so many other areas of my life. The problem is deep down in your being you want that self-control but your body or mind just will not always let you use that self-control, plus your body cries out for all the things that you miss eating, sugar, fat, potatoes, and you want to eat as much as you want, so you get that satisfied feeling of defines of yourself and not self-control. Basically you are trying to hurt yourself. Well, this is interesting. Let think about this why we want to hurt ourselves, maybe because we don’t like ourselves, or we never feel like we think we should about life itself. I’ve opened some questions here that maybe we need to ponder about.

Well I’ve pondered and I really have decided I want to get healthy, I’m not that way now, I can hardly walk, I can’t enjoy my life now, do I dislike myself, at this stage I do, because I’ve let myself get like this. Did I really want to hurt myself, maybe, I just didn’t care whether I got up and moved or what I did. To me I felt like life was over, kids gone, grandchildren living away, only saw them twice a year. I just lost interest in everything. So sometimes we have to keep re-examining our motives of what we want and what we want to do with our lives for the time we have left. As young mothers we put all of ourselves in raising our children, providing the good things for them and when they grow up, we seem lost with out them. Sometimes we have other interest, I didn’t, I did my crafts and when my body started falling apart, I just didn’t care any more. So I’ve started caring again and I want to move and lose this weight. It will take a while but I’m hoping with my writings and help from my blogger friends and family, I will make it this time. I’m trying the calorie way and not the fad way, just taking one day at a time. Sorry so, long. Just a lot of feelings needing to come out. Have a great day.

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